JAMES BOND – What Went Wrong?

Quantum of Solace, Marc Forster – Director, 2008  

Ian Fleming's grave at Sevenhampton--where he is now turning over.

 

 

HOOK: Now Bond is killing fans. 

LINE:  “Who do you trust?” 

SINKER: Do we really deserve this!

 SPANKY: This film starts out with some of the most dazzling personal-chase footage ever seen, then quickly follows it with a plot, characters and settings that are so bad they completely negate the entire Bond franchise. For almost fifty years this has been “over the top” entertainment, with fantasy villains, sexy women, stirring music and preposterous payoffs. Now we get one-note Daniel Craig and some mishmash about global warming even Al Gore wouldn’t buy. You take on the Borne movies by dumping every imaginative thing we’ve been lapping up all these years? If we wanted the Borne films we’d go to the Borne films! All the sex, glamour and fantasy of the movies feels kicked in the groin. All this film does is remind us of all we are missing. I’d rather drink out of the toilet bowl. 

“TWO PAWs Down” (0 BARKs out of four) 

JOHN: As a kid sitting in the theater I was OO7 for two hours. Two hours of sex, tuxedos, ironic asides, my own theme and most important…a license to kill. So here’s a film that supposedly takes all those perks away from our hero. Who’s he suppose to be? Me? For that I don’t need buy a ticket and sit in the dark! I say get the old Sean Connery back. Give him his gun and let him shoot Daniel Craig, Remington Steel, Timothy Dalton and even Roger Moore. That would get us out of our seats cheering more than kickboxing, people falling through glass, and settings in Bolivia. What the hell is Hollywood thinking?   

No GOs (out of four)